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Tuesday, November 6, 2007
12:13:00 PM | 
Posted by
Sukh Sandhu
Different Phases of a man:
After engagement: Superman
After Marriage: Gentleman
After 10 years: Watchman
After 20 years: Doberman
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
There is only one perfect child in the world and every mother has it.
There is only one perfect wife in the world and every neighbor has it
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
Prospective husband: Do you have a book called "Man, The Master of
Women"?
Sales girl: The fiction department is on the other side, sir.
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
The world's thinnest book has only one word written in it:
"Everything"
and the book is titled: "What Women Want!"
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
A man who surrenders when he's WRONG, is HONEST.
A man who surrenders when he's NOT SURE, is WISE.
A man who surrenders when he's RIGHT, is a HUSBAND
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
Girlfriends r like chocolates, taste good anytime.
Lovers r like PIZZAS, Hot n spicy, eaten frequently.
Husbands r like Dal RICE, eaten when there`s no choice
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or cremated?
Man: Don't take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
Q: Why dogs don't marry?
A: Because they are already leading a dog's life!
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
Fact of life: One woman brings you into this world crying & the
other ensures you continue to do so for the rest of your life!
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
Q: Why doesn't law permit a man to marry a second woman?
A: Because as per law you cannot be punished twice for the same
offence
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
What men want: A woman who can cook, a woman who earns good money, a
woman who loves him & a system to make sure that those 3 women never
meet each other!
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
Lady 2 her maid: Oh Kanta, I have reason to suspect that my husband
is having an affair with his secretary."
Kanta : I don't believe it! U r just saying that 2 make me jealous!"
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
Man: I want a divorce. My wife hasn't spoken to me in six months.
Lawyer: Better think it over. Wives like that are hard to get!
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- -------
The bride, upon her engagement, went to her mother & said, "I've
found a man just like father!"
Mother replied, "So what do u want from me,
sympathy?"
After engagement: Superman
After Marriage: Gentleman
After 10 years: Watchman
After 20 years: Doberman
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
There is only one perfect child in the world and every mother has it.
There is only one perfect wife in the world and every neighbor has it
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
Prospective husband: Do you have a book called "Man, The Master of
Women"?
Sales girl: The fiction department is on the other side, sir.
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
The world's thinnest book has only one word written in it:
"Everything"
and the book is titled: "What Women Want!"
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
A man who surrenders when he's WRONG, is HONEST.
A man who surrenders when he's NOT SURE, is WISE.
A man who surrenders when he's RIGHT, is a HUSBAND
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
Girlfriends r like chocolates, taste good anytime.
Lovers r like PIZZAS, Hot n spicy, eaten frequently.
Husbands r like Dal RICE, eaten when there`s no choice
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or cremated?
Man: Don't take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
Q: Why dogs don't marry?
A: Because they are already leading a dog's life!
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
Fact of life: One woman brings you into this world crying & the
other ensures you continue to do so for the rest of your life!
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
Q: Why doesn't law permit a man to marry a second woman?
A: Because as per law you cannot be punished twice for the same
offence
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
What men want: A woman who can cook, a woman who earns good money, a
woman who loves him & a system to make sure that those 3 women never
meet each other!
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
Lady 2 her maid: Oh Kanta, I have reason to suspect that my husband
is having an affair with his secretary."
Kanta : I don't believe it! U r just saying that 2 make me jealous!"
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
Man: I want a divorce. My wife hasn't spoken to me in six months.
Lawyer: Better think it over. Wives like that are hard to get!
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- -------
The bride, upon her engagement, went to her mother & said, "I've
found a man just like father!"
Mother replied, "So what do u want from me,
sympathy?"
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