A funny post and please receive it in the same way............This post and som e of it's points are sooo wonderful that i laughed so much so thought why not share with all of my friends? so here is the post.............

Why A Man Should Have a Dog but not a wife!


1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.

2. Dogs will forgive you for playing with other dogs.

3. If a dog is gorgeous, other dogs don't hate it.

4. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.

5. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.

6. A dog's parents never visit.

7. Dogs do not hate their bodies.

8. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to ge t your point
across.

9. Dogs like to do their snooping outside rather than in your wallet or
desk.

10. Dogs seldom outlive you.

11. Dogs can't talk.

12. You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go 24 hours a
day.

13. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.

14. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.

15. Another man will seldom steal your dog.

16. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, "If I died, would you
get another dog?"

17. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them
away.

18. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a
pervert.

19. A dog won't hold out on you to get a new car.

20. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just
think it's interesting.

21. On a car trip, your dog never insists on running the heater.

22. Dogs don't let magazine articles guide their lives.

23. When your dog gets old, you can have it put to sleep.

24. Dogs like to ride in the back of a pick-up truck.

25. Dogs are not allowed in Bloomingdale' s or Neiman-Marcus.

And, last but not least:

26. If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff.


Thanks :)

6 weeks , 6 months, 6 years . . .Wanna see the difference...........Lets see............

Dating process:
6 weeks : I love U, I love U, I love U.
6 months : Of course I love U.
6 years : GOD, if I didn't love U, then why the hell did I propose?

Back from Work:
6 weeks : Honey, I'm home.
6 months : BACK!!
6 years : What did your mom cook for us today??

Gifts:
6 weeks : Honey, I really hope you liked the ring.
6 months : I bought you a painting; it would fit the motif in the living room.
6 years : Here's the money. Buy yourself something.

Phone Ringing:
6 weeks : Baby, somebody wants you on the phone.
6 months : Here, for you.
6 years : PHONE RINGING.

Cooking:
6 weeks : I never knew food could taste so good!
6 months : What are we having for dinner tonight?
6 years : AGAIN!!!!

Apology:
6 weeks : Honey muffin, don't you worry, Ill never hold this against you.
6 months : Watch out! Don't do it again.
6 years : What's not to understand about what I just said??

New Dress:
6 weeks : Oh my God, you look like an angel in that dress.
6 months : You bought a new dress again???
6 years : How much did THAT cost me?

Planning for Vacations:
6 weeks : How do 2 weeks in Vienna or anywhere you please sound??
6 months : What's so bad about going to India on a charter plane?
6 years : Travel? What's so bad about staying home???

TV:
6 weeks : Baby, what would you like us to watch tonight?
6 months : I like this movie.
6 years : I'm going to watch ESPN, if you're not in the mood, go to bed, I can stay up by myself . .

Again going to post a different love letter after months................Well A different Love letter and a beautiful reply to it................... Often happens in
life...........................so here is the letter and reply to it. :)


A teenage college guy sent a love letter (in Q/A format) to his classmate.


My Dearest Rusha

Please answer the following questionnaire. For Options
(a)10 marks, (b) 5marks and (c) 3 marks

1) Whenever you enter the class room, your sight always falls on me
because:

(a) of love
(b) you couldn't control seeing me
(c) really ... am I doing it?

2) Whenever professor cracks joke, you laugh and turn and look at me
because:

(a) you always like to see me smiling
(b) you are testing whether I like jokes
(c) you are attracted by my smile


3) When you were singing in the class, I entered and immediately you
stopped singing because:

(a) you are so coy to sing before me
(b) my presence influenced you
(c) you feared that whether I'll like your song


4) When you were showing your child photo, when I asked for it, you
hide it because:

(a) you felt ashamed
(b) you felt uneasy
(c) you don't know


5) During trekking, myself and my friend gave you hand for lifting you
and you took only my friend's because:

(a) you enjoyed my disappointment
(b) you won't feel leaving my hand after grabbing
(c) you don't know


6) You were waiting yesterday for bus and didn't get into your bus...

(a) you were waiting for me
(b) you were dreaming about me and didn't notice the bus
(c) that bus was crowded


7) You introduced me to your parents when they came to college
because:

(a) I am going to be your groom
(b) you just want to know what your parents think about me
(c) just you felt like introducing me to them


8) I told that I like girls wearing roses. Next day, you came with a
rose on your head because:

(a) to fulfill my wish
(b) you like roses
(c) by chance you got a rose


9) On that day, it was my birthday. you too came to temple early at 6:00
AM
because:

(a) you want to pray along with me
(b) you want to meet me before any one could meet on my birthday
(c) you want to wish me at temple because you are spiritual

If you have scored more than 40, then you are loving me. Don't delay
in expressing it. If you have scored between 30 and 40, love is budding
in your heart and it's getting ready to bloom. If you have scored less
than 30, you are in confusion whether to love me or not.

Eagerly awaiting your reply..
love,


---------------------------------------- -------------------- ----------
---------------------------------------- -------
---------------------------------------- -------------------- ----------
---------------------------------------- -------



Rusha's reply letter was also in Q/A format........

,

Please answer the following Yes/No questionnaire.

1) If somebody sits in the first row, normally people entering the
class, sees them.
(a) Yes
(b) No

2) If a girls laughs and looks anyone, is it love?
(a) Yes
(b) No


3) While singing, if somebody forgets lines of the songs, will he/she
stop singing or not ?
(a) Yes
(b) No


4) I was showing to my friends (who are all girls) my childhood photo.
You poked your nose inside..... right ?
(a) Yes
(b) No


5) I avoided to hold your hand during trekking. Couldn't you understand
yet?
(a) Yes
(b) No


6) Should I not wait for my best friend (Anjali) at the bus stand?
(a) Yes
(b) No


7) Shouldn't I introduce you to my parents as a friend?
(a) Yes
(b) No


8) You have said you also like Lotus, cauliflower, banana's flower. Is
it true ?
(a) Yes
(b) No


9) Oh was that your birthday. That's why I could see you in temple. I
come daily to Temple. Do you know ?
(a) Yes
(b) No


If you have answered "Yes" to any of the question, then I am not
loving you. If you have answered "No", then you don't know the meaning
of Love.

Hope everything is clear to you.

TRANSLATIONS OF TERMS USED BY MAN AND WOMEN: well yes............here we are trying to understand BIG BIG advertisements of newspapers, and of other MEDIA'S ........................why men and female use those terms and what they really mean by that.........Well this is only for fun and not to offend anyone......Thanks.............here is the list..............


FIRST THE WOMEN:

§ 40-ish ............... 49

§ Adventurer.....Has had more partners than you ever will

§ Athletic.......................Flat-ches ted

§ Average looking.......... Ugly

§ Beautiful..................... Pathological liar

§ Contagious smile......... Bring your penicillin

§ Educated ................... College dropout

§ Emotionally secure....... Medicated

§ Feminist....................... Fat; a ball buster

§ Free spirit.................... Substance user

§ Friendship First......... Trying to live down a reputation as a slut

§ Fun........................... Annoying & Talks A Lot

§ Gentle ..................... Comatose

§ Good listener ........... Borderline autistic

§ New-age ....................Body Piercing &/or Tattoos

§ Old-fashioned ........... Lights out, missionary position only

§ Open-minded ............. Desperate

§ Outgoing.................... Loud

§ Passionate.................. Loud

§ Poet..................... .....Depressive schizophrenic

§ Professional...............Aggressive &/or Overbearing

§ Redhead.................... Shops the Clairol section

§ Reubenesque..............Fat

§ Romantic.................. Looks better by candlelight

§ Voluptuous............... Grossly Fat

§ Weight proportional to height......Watch Out!!

§ Wants soulmate..........One step away from stalking

§ Widow...................... Nagged first husband to death

§ Young at heart.......... Toothless crone

THE MALE SIDE OF THE LIST:

§ 40-ish...................52 and looking for 25-yr-old

§ Athletic................Sits on the couch and watches ESPN

§ Average looking...Unusual hair growth on ears, nose, and back

§ Educated..............Will always treat you like an idiot

§ Free Spirit............ Sleeps with your sister

§ Friendship first..... As long as friendship includes touching & nudity.

§ Fun........................Good with a remote and a six pack

§ Good looking.........Arrogant

§ Honest....................Pathological liar

§ Huggable................Overweight, more body hair than a buffalo

§ Likes to cuddle.......Insecure, overly dependent

§ Mature ...................Until you get to know him

§ Open-minded..........Wants to sleep with your sister but she's not interested

§ Physically fit............I spend a lot of time in front of mirror admiring myself

§ Poet....................... Has written on a bathroom stall

§ Spiritual.................. Once went to temple with his grandmother before promotion on the work

§ Stable..................... Occasional stalker, but never arrested

From a little book called "Disorder in the Court: Great Fractured Moments in Courtroom History"................... Here are some funny things happened in court....................All are real incidents and frankly all in all simply great humour.............Hope you'll love it :)

Bizarre or funny things that really have happened!

A Woman's Ultimate Fantasy

In a recent Harris On-line poll 38,562 men across the US were asked to identify woman's ultimate fantasy. 97.8% of the respondents said that a woman's ultimate fantasy is to have two men at once.

While this has been verified by a recent sociological study, it appears that most men do not realize that in this fantasy, one man is cooking and the other is cleaning.

Yes..................It is a MISTAKE!!! is a very special series I liked this a lot....................well as this is very first time so i am going to post down this series pics from the prospective of a student..................I know you are confused that what Sukh is saying.............well you will understand very soon...........when you will reach to the last pic of this first series.............It is a MISTAKE!!!

1. A FOOLish man tells a woman to STOP talking, but a WISE man tells her that she looks extremely BEAUTIFUL when her LIPS are CLOSED.

2. One GOOD way to REDUCE Alcohol consumption :
Before Marriage - Drink whenever you are SAD,
After Marriage - Drink whenever you are HAPPY


3. Three FASTEST means of Communication :
1. Tele-Phone
2. Tele-Vision
3. Tell to Woman
Need still FASTER - Tell her NOT to tell ANY ONE.

4. Love your friends not their sisters. Love your sisters not their friends.

5. A man got 2 wishes from GOD. He asked for the Best wine and Best Woman.
Next moment, he had the Best Wine and Mother Teresa next to him.
Moral : BE SPECIFIC

6. What is a BEST and WORST news you can hear at the SAME time ?
It is when your Girl Friend says YOU are the BEST KISSER among all your Friends.

7. Let us be generous like this : Four Ants are moving through a forest.
They see an ELEPHANT coming towards them. Ant 1 says : we should KILL him.
Ant 2 says : No, Let us break his Leg alone. Ant 3 says : No, we will just throw him away from our path.
Ant 4 says : No, we will LEAVE him because he is ALONE and we are FOUR.

8. If you do NOT have a Girl Friend - You are missing SOME thing in your life.
If you HAVE a Girl Friend - You are missing EVERY thing in your life.

9. Question : When do you CONGRATULATE someone for their MISTAKE.
Answer : On their MARRIAGE.

10. When your LIFE is in DARKNESS, PRAY GOD and ask him to free you from Darkness.
Even after you pray, if U R still in Darkness - Please PAY the ELECTRICITY BILL.

11. Why Government do NOT allow a Man to MARRY 2 Women.
Because per Constitution, you can NOT PUNISH TWICE for the same Mistake.

12. "A Ship is always safe at the shore - but that is NOT what it is built for" - Albert Einstein

Lets find-out some of the real Newspaper Headlines......and which newspaper has basically published those headlines or the source of that funny newspaper/ or any other media...........Headlines............If you know you can contribute and your contribution is as always very important...............so here are some of the real Newspaper Headlines......

Ever wonder what google.com think about YOU? ha ha :)) well yes you can find out that and if you wish you can also share with us here..........on G4M...............well what you hav eto do is to log in to

http://www.googlism.com/

and Googlism.com will find out what Google.com thinks of you, your friends or anything! Search for your name here or for a good laugh check out some of the popular Googlisms below.

Interviewer: Tell me about yourself.
Candidate: I am Rameshwar Kulkarni. I did my Tele Communication engineering from Baban Rao Dhole Institute of Technology.

Interviewer: Baban Rao Dhole. Institute of Technology? I had never heard of this college before!
Candidate: Great! Even I had not heard of it before getting an admission into it. What happened is - due to cricket world cup I scored badly in 12th. I was getting a paid seat in a good college. But my father said (I prefer to call him 'baap') - "I can not invest so much of money."(The baap actually said - "I will never waste so much of money on you"). So I had to join this college. Frankly speaking this name - BabanRao Dhole, can at the most be related to a Shetakari Mahavidyalaya.

Interviewer: ok, ok. It seems you have taken 6 years to complete your engineering.
Candidate: Actually I tried my best to finish it in 4 years. But you know, these cricket matches and football world cup, and tennis tournaments. It is difficult to concentrate. So I flunked in 2nd and 3rd year. So in all I took 4 + 2 = 7 years.

Interviewer: But 4+2 is 6.
Candidate: Oh, is it? You know I always had KT in maths. But I will try to keep this in mind. 4+2 is 6, good, thanks. These cricket matches really affect exams a lot. I think they should ban it.

Interviewer: Good to know that you want cricket matches to be banned.
Candidate: No, no.. I am talking about Exams!!

Interviewer: Ok, What is your biggest achievement in life?
Candidate: Obviously, completing my Engineering. My mom never thought I would complete it. In fact, when i flunked in 3rd year, she was looking for a job for me in BEST through some relative.

Interviewer: Do you have any plans of higher study?
Candidate: he he he.. Are you kidding? Completing 'lower' education
itself was so much of pain!!

Interviewer: Let's talk about technical stuff. On which platforms have you worked?
Candidate: Well, I work at KPHB (Kukatpalli Housing Board), so you can say Ameerpet is my current platform. Earlier I was at Charminaar center. So Charminaar was my platform then. As you can see I have experience of different platforms!

Interviewer: And which languages have you used?
Candidate: Telugu, Hindi, English. By the way, I can keep quiet in German, French, Russian and many other languages he he he...

Interviewer: Why VC is better than VB?
Candidate: It is a common sense - C comes after B. So VC is a higher version than VB. I heard very soon they are coming up with a new language VD!

Interviewer: Do you know anything about Assembly Language?
Candidate: Well, I have not heard of it. But I guess, this is the
language our ministers and MPs use in assembly.

Interviewer: What is your general project experience?
Candidate: My general experience about projects is - most of the times they are in pipeline!

Interviewer: Can you tell me about your current job?
Candidate: Sure, Currently I am working for Bata InfoTech ltd. Since joining BIL (Bata InfoTech Ltd.), I am on Bench. Before joining BIL, I used to think that Bench was another software like Windows he he he..

Interviewer: Do you have any project management experience?
Candidate: No, but I guess it shouldn't be difficult. I know Word and Excel. I can talk a lot. I know how to dial for International phone call and use speaker facility. And very important - I know few words like - 'Showstoppers ', 'hotfixes', 'SEI-CMM', 'quality', 'version control', 'deadlines', 'Customer Satisfaction' etc. Also I can blame others for my mistakes!

Interviewer: What are your expectations from our company?
Candidate: Not much.

1. I should at least get 40,000 in hand.
2. I would like to work on a live EJB project. But it should not have deadlines. I personally feel that pressure affects natural talent.
3. I believe in flexi-timings.
4. Dress code is against basic freedom, so I would like to wear t-shirt and jeans.
5. We must have sat-sun off. I will suggest wednesday off also, so as to avoid breakdown due to overwork.
6. I would like to go abroad 3 times a year on short term preferably 1-2 months) assignments. Personally I prefer US, Australia and Europe. But considering the fact that there is a world cup in West Indies in 2007, I don't mind going there in that period. As you can see I am modest and don't have many expectations.

Interviewer: he he he ha ha ha. Thanks for your interest in our organization. In fact I was never entertained so much before. Welcome to INFOSYS..:-))
We look forward to working with you..:-))

1. when in college : Hum honge kaamyaab, Hum honge kaamyaab ek din.....

2. when giving interview to Multi National Company: Tu hi re.. Tu hi re ....tere binaa
main kaise jiyunn....

3. waiting for interview result: Intehaa ho gai Intzaarki.. aayinaa kuch khabar
mere yaarki...

4. just joined: Too cheez bhadi hai mast mast.....

5. after some time: Ye kahaan aagaye hum?? na ghar hai, naa thikaana! humein
martay jaana hai

6. After some more time: Naa koi umang hai, naa koyi tarang hai, mere zindagi kya
ek kati Pathang hai (booohoooo)

7. floating the resume: kabootar ja ja ja... kabootar ja ja ja... pehele pyar ki peheli
chitthi...

8. finally when you don't get a better offer any longer: Jeena yahaan, marna
yahaan iske siwa jaana kahaan...!

When you take a long time, you're slow.
When your boss takes a long time, he's thorough.

When you don't do it, you're lazy.
When your boss doesn't do it, he's too busy.

When you make a mistake, you're an idiot.
When your boss makes a mistake, he's only human.

When doing something without being told, you're overstepping your authority.
When your boss does the same thing, that's initiative.

When you take a stand, you're being bull-headed.
When your boss does it, he's being firm.

When you overlooked a rule of etiquette, you're being rude.
When your boss skips a few rules, he's being original.

When you please your boss, you're apple polishing.
When your boss pleases his boss, he's being cooperative.

When you're out of the office, you're wandering around.
When your boss is out of the office, he's on business.

When you're on a day off sick, you're always sick.
When your boss is a day off sick, he must be very ill.

When you apply for leave, you must be going for an interview.
When your boss applies for leave, it's because he's overworked.

English signs in different Countries

Cocktail lounge, Norway:
"LADIES
ARE REQUESTED
NOT TO HAVE
CHILDREN IN THE BAR."
------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- ------

At a Budapest zoo:
"PLEASE DO NOT FEED THE ANIMALS.
IF YOU HAVE ANY SUITABLE FOOD,
GIVE IT TO THE GUARD ON
DUTY."

------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- ------
Doctors' office, Rome:
"SPECIALIST
IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES."

------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- ------

Dry cleaners, Bangkok:
"DROP
YOUR TROUSERS HERE
FOR THE BEST RESULTS."

------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- ------


In a Nairobi restaurant:
"CUSTOMERS
WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES
RUDE OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER."

------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- ------

On an Indian river highway:
"TAKE NOTICE -
WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER,
THIS ROAD IS IMPASSABLE."

------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- ------

In a City restaurant:
"OPEN
SEVEN DAYS A WEEK
AND WEEKENDS."

------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- ------

A sign seen on an automatic
restroom hand dryer:
"DO NOT
ACTIVATE WITH WET HANDS."

------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- ------

In a cemetery:
"PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED
FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY,
BUT THEIR OWN, GRAVES."

------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- ------
Tokyo hotel's rules ad regulations:
"GUESTS ARE REQUESTED
NOT TO SMOKE
OR DO OTHER DISGUSTING BEHAVIORS IN BED."

------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- ------

On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:
"OUR WINES
LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR."

In a Tokyo bar:
"SPECIAL COCKTAILS
FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS."

Hotel, Yugoslavia:
"THE FLATTENING OF
UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE
IS THE JOB OF THE CHAMBERMAID. "


Hotel, Japan:
"YOU ARE INVITED
TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID. "

In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a
Russian Orthodox
monastery:
"YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT
THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIET COMPOSERS,
ARTISTS, AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY."

A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest:
"IT IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN
ON OUR BLACK FOREST CAMPING SITE
THAT PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT SEX,
FOR INSTANCE MEN AND WOMEN,
LIVE TOGETHER IN ONE TENT UNLESS THEY ARE MARRIED WITH EACH OTHER
FOR THIS PURPOSE."


Hotel, Zurich:
"BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY
OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX
IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT
THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS PURPOSE."


Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand:
"WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?"


In the window on a Swedish furrier:
"FUR COATS MADE FOR LADIES FROM THEIR OWN SKIN."

The box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong:
"GUARANTEED TO WORK THROUGHOUT ITS USEFUL LIFE."

In a Swiss mountain
inn:
"SPECIAL TODAY - NO ICE-CREAM."

Airline ticket office, Copenhagen:
"WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS."

A laundry in Rome:
"LADIES,
LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE
AND SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME."

Have Fun :))